Introduction

I’m not gonna lie and go about declaring that I’ve always wanted to be a writer. I mean, putting aside the fact that the dodgy semantics of that declaration would imply that I’ve wanted to be a writer since the dawn of time (which quite simply isn’t possible because, even if I had been born at the beginning of existence, for sure the dinosaurs would’ve gobbled me up pretty quickly), I can’t hide the fact that I had other dreams before I first picked up a pen. I wanted to be a Gladiator, y’know.

No, not a gladiator like the ones in Ancient Rome (dinosaurs and gladiators... you must be thinking I’m really old); I’m talking about that TV series presented by Ulrika-ka-ka-kaaaa Jonsson (I don’t know why I just did that). I used to have a poster of one of the female Gladiators on my bedroom wall; I think the poster was intended for frustrated teenage boys, but when I lay there gazing at it, I preferred to conjure up scenarios in my head whereby Gladiator-whose-name-I-don’t-remember and I would beat up lots of people up together. Bad people, that is. I saw myself as a bit of a 4-foot superhero with dimples.

So you see, I’m not really a cliché at all. I haven’t always wanted to be a writer. The writing thing just sort of happened because... Well, I’m not too sure why, really. It just happened. I suppose my inability to do a cartwheel and the fact that I love cookies too much to satisfy the demands of a Gladiator must have contributed slightly to the change of direction of my career.

So this is my blog. I wish I could give you some kind of indication as to what it might contain, but in truth I never was good at sticking to a plan (as evidenced by the above story). But I can promise that, if you read it, little WTF-shaped clouds will float through your brain occasionally. Be rest assured it’s a harmless side-effect.