Wednesday 15 December 2010

Chat-up lines of the 21st Century

I'm sure chat-up lines are getting worse. Yesterday I found myself in a scenario whereby a man was boasting to me and another woman that his ex-girlfriend wore a "600 cup". What that's supposed to mean, I'm not entirely sure, but I think it has something to do with her bust measurement. For the man's sake, I hope he was taking the pee. If he was trying to be funny, nobody laughed; if he was trying to be impressive, we were not impressed (I know the general rule of the thumb is "the bigger the better", but there have to be some exceptions, surely), and if, heaven forbid, it is true that his ex-girlfriend had a bust measurement of 600, I can only presume that she ate A LOT of pies and that the woman has, by now, serious back problems. Him taking the pee out of us is the only feasible excuse for coming out with such a weird confession, I'm sorry.

Things didn't get any better for the poor soul who was trying to being smooth, either, for after making statements about his ex's alarming boobage, he then went on to inadvertently admit to wearing women's clothes - which might not have been such a bad thing, if it weren't for the fact that he didn't look like the most 'secure' of men.

I'm curious, though: is there such a thing as a good chat-up line? Did all the good ones become cheesy clichés, and all the bad ones, by default, become ridiculous? Even my cat has more class than most men these days: about a week ago, our tom demonstrated great chivalry in bringing a leaf in from outisde and placing it at our female cat's paws. This was right before, y'know, he jumped on her back and started biting her neck. But at least he was gentleman enough to bring her a gift first.

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